our christmas tree killed itself.

I know, I know. I just wrote a blog the other week about how beneficial waking up in the morning and exercising was to my general life. But then I realized that I was mentally freaking out any time I was going to sleep later than 9:30 and I also realized that since I don't absolutely have to, 4:30am is way too early to wake up. (It's too early to wake up even if you DO have to). So, I've changed things up. I am exercising at night. Given it's impossible for it to be quite as consistent since there are sometimes things going on when I get off work, especially during the Christmas season, but I have realized several benefits to this option. 

• I get to exercise with Luke
• I am more motivated
• I get to sleep until 5:30 or 6am
• I am less stressed about the amount of sleep I am getting

So, this is the way things are going to stay, unless I ever could exercise in the morning and still wake up at 5:30 or 6. 

I'm starting a food journal. Yep, it's starting today. I've learned that a huge part of having discipline is simply being aware of what you are doing. So, if I'm writing down everything that I put in my mouth (even just a bite of cake), I'll be more aware. And I think sometimes I may not eat certain things just because I don't want to have to write them down.

I've also decided to keep a "sentence journal". I got this idea from The Happiness Project (as well as the food journal idea). I've always been a journal keeper, but often I slack off because the prospect of writing seems like something I need a lot of time for. The idea behind a sentence journal is that I can write 1-5 sentences about whatever I want, each day, and I won't feel guilty that I'm not writing more, but at least I am writing something. 

Our Christmas tree killed itself. Ever since we got it the day after Thanksgiving, it has refused to drink water. I hoped it would hold out until Christmas, but by the end of this past week, all the branches were hanging low and it was starting to turn brown. So, we strapped in on the top of our car with twine (and if you have ever seen an unbundled Christmas tree on top of a car, it's quite a site--very Clark Griswold-esque) and took that sucker back where it came from--Lowe's. They gave us a new one. It's not as beautiful as the last one since it's the week before Christmas and the pickins are slim, but it's green and LOVES to drink water, so I love it. 

We went to Leavenworth this past weekend with friends. Leavenworth is a little Bavarian town on the east side of the Cascade Mountains. It was basically a dying town and the city council decided they could save it if they turned it into a little Germany. It's a completely ridiculous place, complete with a classic Bavarian McDonalds, a tiny hill where they have hauled snow in from the mountain (well, some might call it snow--it was more like icy mud) for children to sled on and cheap plastic sleds for $20. My favorite part of the evening was commentating on the ridiculously overpriced Christmas ornaments of angels with no pants on. Also, the bratwursts. 

The Abare's are coming this week. It's going to be a good, old-fashioned Christmas here in Sea-town. 

Merry Christmas, everyone!

the colors of the morning

By the time I get on the 242 from Seattle to Redmond in the mornings, the bus is usually pretty full. Often, the only open seats are in the accordion part of the bus where no one likes to sit (I am pretty sure it would have most people puking within minutes because of the way it moves). Thankfully, I’m not prone to motion sickness, so I usually have two seats to myself, which I really like, because then I am not trying to not slide into someone else when the bus is turning. I hate that. The bad part about sitting in the accordion, though, is that there aren’t windows in that part of the bus, and it’s difficult to see out of the other ones. 

This morning as we were driving across Lake Washington and I was reading my book, I happened to glance up and saw a reflection of orange out of the corner of my eye. I began craning my neck and was finally able to get a pretty decent view of one of the most beautiful sunrises that I have ever seen. It was a fairly cloudy morning, but the clouds were thick and low and as the sun came through them, it created a beautiful orange and hot pink pattern in the sky. That combined with the reflection on the water was absolutely breathtaking. I spent the next five minutes staring out that window. I know it was making the man who I was looking past to see through the window behind him feel uncomfortable as I noticed him awkwardly trying to avoid eye contact, but I really didn’t care. I couldn’t take my eyes away from it. In those moments, I was struck by the phrase from a Phil Wickham’s song, “The colors of the morning are inside your eyes.” That sunset was beautiful and realizing that I worship the God who created it (and is even more beautiful) was a moment of worship in and of itself. 

Whenever I don’t want to get out of bed in the morning, it helps to remember that I might see a sunrise. Sunrises are always worth it. 

there is only love.

I am reading The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin and in it she addresses happiness—the goals she makes to achieve it, why it is important and why it is not only good for you, but also good for everyone around you, for you to be happy. Each month, Gretchen focuses on different areas of her life that she wants to better—Vitality, Friendship, Attitude…the list goes on. 

In February, she focuses on marriage. Gretchen realizes that she can’t change her husband, but she can change herself. She makes an effort to look past her husband’s faults and focus on his positive attributes. She disciplines herself to be purposefully nice to him. In the midst of the chapter, she recognizes a truth that is quite sad: those we love most, we tend to neglect, take for granted or even fail to treat them with the same courtesy we would treat a stranger. On a quest to better her marriage and be a better wife, Gretchen remembers something a friend once told her: “There is only love.”

A friend of mine was the source of that commandment. She came up with the phrase when she was considering taking a high-pressure job where she’d be working for a notoriously difficult person. The person handling the hiring process told her, “I’m going to be honest with you. John Doe is very effective, but he’s an extremely tough guy to work for. Think hard about whether you want this job.” My friend really wanted the job so she decided, “There is only love.” From that moment on, she refused to think critical thoughts about John Doe; she never complained about him behind his back; she wouldn’t even listen to other people criticize him.…If my friend could do that for her boss, why couldn’t I do it for Jamie [her husband]? Deep down, I had only love for Jamie—but I was allowing too many petty issues to get in the way.

I’m only on the third chapter, but so far this small passage and that tiny little phrase have stood out to me more than anything else. If Gretchen’s friend could do this for her boss and if Gretchen could do it for her husband, why can I not take this phrase and employ it in my life. Why not hold onto that gleaming truth and when I am irritated with the clerk at the store who takes 48 seconds to scan each item? Why not remember love when a friend forgets plans that we made two weeks ago? Or when a customer service agent seems incompetent? These are things I let get under my skin. I can become angry, hurt and most certainly unhappy. Applying this principle, There is only love, seems like simple wisdom in the face of the human tendency to react quickly based on feelings. Instead of letting our feelings guide us, why not guide our feelings. So here is my goal: when someone does something that is frustrating or even hurtful, I will try to remember There is only love.